Friday, May 23, 2008

Booze in the mail and the missing phone


There's nothing like greeting the UPS dude at the front door and having you sign for alcohol! Woo hoo!! I did an artistic favor for a friend and was rewarded with none other than some excellent wine, and by mail nonetheless! (thanks Jen, you rock) I'll be breaking out the glasses and toasting myself tonight...alone.....maybe I'll share with my mom....maybe.
Well folks, it's Friday....Lonnie is still gone, the boys are taking their naps right now and it's raining. The house is unusually quite. No dishwasher. No dryer. No wash machine. (I'm finally caught up on Laundry...until tomorrow at least) No screaming "get Brody away mom!" or "I need a snack mom!" All I can hear is the rain outside and the occasionally snort from a sleeping dog on the couch. I think I'm ready to move Brody back into Baylor's room...this will be attempt #3. He's been sleeping through the night for almost a week, with a few crying jags here and there, but he usually goes back to sleep. I don't want to jinx this amazing feat that is no short of a miracle and has taken all but a lifetime to achieve. They both are pretty much done with their smokers cough and the snot is subsiding significantly. Once again, can't wait to regain our room back.
THE GREAT PHONE HUNT
Ummmm so I can't find our phone. I have searched every single place in this house and even paged it (but that battery must be dead or the dog ate it because I can't hear anything) I'm pretty sure Baylor chucked it somewhere. He has a tendency to hurl things for no apparent reason. Like the time I found SIX sippy cups half full of strange liquids behind the t.v ( I wondered where that rancid smell was coming from....) and then the time I found a graham cracker shoved in the VCR and seven little army dudes inside of my running shoes (they're probably safe in there, haven't busted those out for a while) I don't remember who I talked to last or where the heck I could have put it. In the process of looking for the phone I did find some pretty interesting things strewn about the house. (DISCLAIMER: don't be freaked out by what you read in the following statements, it may possibly be too much information)
1. Half eaten apple core wedged between the garbage can and the desk....yum.
2. A pair of underwear with the crotch chewed out, not a kinky fashion statement, my dogs seem to gravitate towards gross things like that
3. A bottle of Astroglide...seriously, I know that may be too much information for ya'll but I have no idea why in the world it was under the couch...once again, blaming Baylor and his strange fascination with bottles (he makes them into people and talks to them) Now you know more information that you needed to.
4. 3 socks, 2 missing shoes, one pair of shorts and a partridge in a pear tree.
I'm pretty sure I'm losing it. I also unloaded the dishwasher this morning and was totally stoked to get it done before breakfast until I realized that I had unloaded an entire load of DIRTY dishes back into the cabinets. This is what happens when you have children, some of you may want to reconsider procreating until you're ready to let go of your mind. We may be investing in a new phone here shortly, unless Lonnie can find it. Which will probably be the case because he hasn't lost his mind nearly as much as I.
MONKEY MAN HIDES AGAIN
I turn my back for a second and he's either inside of the t.v cabinet or inside of the toy box. This kid is a monkey and won't sit still for more than a second. Keeps me on my toes or more like running in all directions. This is also how I maintain my girlish figure....sort of. Okay, who am I fooling, I have no girlish figure, but it sounded good.

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