Monday, November 17, 2008

The great debate

Sometimes I just wish God would write out in plain English and very legible what he wants us to do.....maybe even in neon letters with a big flashing arrow....yea, that's perfect. It sure would make life a whole lot easier, but not as much fun. We have come to a point in our lives where we are toying around with the idea of making our family of four a family of five. So many factors stand in our way...like we'd have to get another car (three car seats in little Bessie just won't cut it) all around finances, timing, going back to work later, how far apart do we want them, etc etc etc. Making the decision to have two kids was easy, but making it three is so much harder than I imagined. My biggest hang up is that I don't want to regret it later down the road when we are older, "man, I wish we had more kids." I know God will bless us no matter how many little Speidels are running around, I just wish the decision was easier. Both Lonnie and I go back and forth. We are so amazingly blessed with our two boys now and we love the fact that we are one on one with a kid (not to mention it's a whole heck of a lot easier when in public) If we do decide to add to the family, there are so many questions like where will baby go? How will we pay for baby Do we want them further apart than the boys? Some days I am all for it and others (like right now Brody is screaming his head off) I think I cannot fathom having another. I am trying not to be influenced by outside factors (like our church, aka known as the baby making factory) or the fact that it would be fun to have a girl (even though I'd be terrified at the concept of a mini me) I will not tell a lie, I dislike the new baby stage. Yes, babies are cute and cuddly and precious and they smell real nice...BUT they wake up a lot, the poop a lot, they scream a lot and they make your boobs hurt a lot. Those reasons, as selfish as they may be, are true. I do not enjoy being pregnant, but enjoy the end result of a wonderful human life that God created. Okay God, now would be an appropriate time for that neon sign, "Keri Speidel, here is how many children I want you do have...." Can you tell this has been on my mind for a while? I'm not really sure how to take the whole, "be fruitful and multiply" thing...but then again, I was never good at multiplication. So for now, I continue to pray that God will make it clear to BOTH Lonnie and I what are future should hold as far as midgets :)

3 comments:

Crazy Mom said...

Ummm...3 babies equal roids man, roids all the way... Ugh. But don't let my hiney influence you! :-)

By the way, your description of a new baby sounds a lot like my description of a grown man... "They poop a lot, they make your boobs hurt" etc. etc.

:-)

Janice said...

This baby maker will not try to influence you, I think you are going about it in the right way. Let God lead you in your(and Lonnies) decision on the growth of your brood. But it doesnt hurt to get ideas from others with bigger families on how they made the transition from 2 to 3 and then take from it what you choose to. I think in this 2.5 kid society it is hard to get that info, most information is based on only that, which is unfortunate. CAnt vouch on the roids thing, c sections and the no push thing and all...:) I know you and Lonnie will be excellent parents for whatever way you choose to go. Remember God choose them for you no matter how many.

Jill Kapfer said...

I wish that I was in the position where I could even consider having another baby. I would love to have another, right now, but all the factors that you mentioned make it impossible so I won't even try. I think it's always hard to imagine. I remember when I couldn't fathom the thought of taking two to the grocery store, now it's a piece of cake. So whatever happens, you'll be fine. You're a wonderful mother regardless of how many you end up with. The good thing is that you have time on your side, you're still young so even if you decide that right now is not the time, you still have plenty of time later down the road.