Saturday, November 29, 2008
This is the source of many debacles in my life. Also the source of high anxiety, stress and complete and utter analness. Me? Nooooo.....yeeeessss. I am a schedule freak. A schedule freak that has shortness of breath when you say, "plan? Heck no." See, I can't even write it without busting out my paper bag....deep breath.
Okay, got it together now.
Let me give you an example of how I ruined a perfectly good date with my husband with another case of freakinschedulitis kicked in.
Activity: Shopping for Christmas presents and getting a bite to eat.
Keri's definition of "bite to eat": Something cheap (we're on a budget here!) and quick and maybe portable, so we can get back to shopping, time must not be wasted even when it comes to consuming calories.
Lonnie's definition of "bite to eat": Sit down, talk, enjoy the food, then continue shopping at our own leisurely pace.
What goes through Keri's head when we arrive at mall: Sweet, we'll eat at the food court (hello Orange Chicken) and then hit Target and Scheels and maybe Bath and Body Works if we have time and avoiding the crazy merchants in the middle of the mall that try to sell you smelly bottles of disappointment. Pulls out detailed Christmas list with budgeted allotment for each individual and gift idea. Hello dork pants.
What goes through Lonnie's head when we arrive at Mall: Gross, I hate the food court, I do not want to eat here. Let's shop first and then eat later. Where? I have no plan...I fly by the seat of my pants, I laugh in the face of danger..I.....is that a free sample?
What we end up doing: We hit Target first and find a few gifts, all is well...we're having fun and then I LOOK AT MY WATCH. Holy buckets Batman, we don't have much time left.....so then my brain kicks into overdrive and I subdivide everything, give everything a time schedule and plan. This, my friends, does not make husbands happy. We start to argue and then it's all down hill from there...
I ruined a perfectly good date with my husband all because I decided to schedule life.
YOU CAN'T SCHEDULE LIFE. (but possible you children's naps, mealtimes, clothing choices...umm, never mind...)
Another wonderful example of my creative yet freakish brain is the way my furniture is set up. We had to move furniture in order to fit Christmas tree and a couch that was given to us (love it...and yes, we have three couches in one small house...we're working on it) and a chair (aka "the naughty chair" to my children") was sticking out (and still is) in this very awkward and non flowing way. Now, things in my house have to be just so or I feel like there is a weight on my chest and that whole hyperventilation thing happens. I know you think I'm crazy, but just ask Lonnie...oh yea, I'm not crazy. Anyways, it bothered me all morning and I couldn't even be in the same room with it....IT WAS NOT RIGHT. It's still there...I peek over at it and cringe every so often. This chair will be the death of me...along with scheduling. I digress.
So, I must go (got to plan the next two weeks meals....SEE! I told you!) Just remember the moral to this story......
YOU CAN'T SCHEDULE LIFE (and that stinkin chair will remain)
Friday, November 28, 2008
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
1. Sometimes when I drop food on the floor, I pick it up and eat it...OR feed it to my children..is that bad? More like the 1 minutes rule rather than 5 seconds...and being the germ freak I am, this astounds me. I do hate to see food wasted though and my floors are relatively clean....relatively.
2. I have been purposefully convicted in my bible reading and prayer life. I need to find more desire to stay in the word and pray consistently. I also want to be seen by my kids....so they know it's something I'm proud of and enjoy doing. Fact is I just need to get my butt out of bed earlier than my kids...but I love sleep...LOVE SLEEP.
3. I pee in the shower. Oh C'mon...I KNOW YOU DO IT TOO!!!!! Don't' lie, don't be ashamed. What better place to do it...it gets washed down the drain and pee is sterile (for the most part, unless you drink it) Now that you are completely and utterly grossed out......
4. I hate sleeping with pants on. I feel smothered and despise the fact that when you turn one way and your pants stay the other way....ugh...torture. It's like a straight jacked for your legs. Legs deserved to be free.
5. Sometimes when my kids are throwing fits and whining....first of all, I want to join them and secondly,I blank out and have no idea what to do. Panic sets in and I stare at them like a deer in headlights.
6. I know it said five, but I'm being rebellious and adding one. I despise the word MOIST...even writing it makes me cringe. Can't you use another word to describe that cake? ewww, gross.
Monday, November 24, 2008
Blatant defiance and air born crazies. Check out the sign......
And here we have our personal sand box during the winter...aka the long jump pit at Cornell. Brody ingested about 1/3 of the sand...just because.
ONE M&M did this! ONE!!!! Can you guess what color it was?
So we escaped this morning with my very pregnant friend Amy and her two little girls. Our goal was to "walk" the baby right out of her while our kids played in the sand of the long jump pit and jumped on the pole vault mats. She walked about a mile, so we'll see if that helped at all. We will be frequenting the track and all of it's many amenities very often this winter. Three cheers for warm indoor spaces where children can run free.
We head to Lake City, Minnesota (Minnetoto as Baylor calls it) on Wednesday to visit Kim and Dirk (Lonnie's sister and brother in law) for Thanksgiving. Baylor is super excited and has already made plans to play with them and show them all of this toys. It's a four hour drive...which compared to our Montana trip, is a piece of cheesecake. They haven't met Brody and we plan on introducing him the proper way...by having him destroy just about everything in their house :) Kim and Dirk...meet Brody the destroyer.
So I'm in the middle of two great books and three great magazines. Lonnie and I bought the Love Dare book this weekend and started it. It's used in the movie Fireproof...which we haven't seen but come highly recommended by all who have. Jeepers, I haven't seen a movie in over two years! Sadness. Anyways, it has a mini lesson and then a "love dare" at the end of the chapter. Today's is to not say anything negative to your spouse at all and if you feel the urge...simply shut your mouth. I have the duct tape handy because I know it will be hard for me. The second books is still the "Don't make me count to three" by Ginger Plowman. It is amazing and I am soaking every chapter in...taking notes and going back to remember what I've read. Now putting all of these nuggets of knowledge into practice will be my next challenge!
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Friday, November 21, 2008
Weight: 31lbs and holding
Shoe size: 8
Clothing size: almost a 4T (he'll grow)
Favorite foods: Mac and Cheese, cheese and mac, yogurt covered raisins, apples, smoothies and chocolate (That's my boy!)
Favorite toys: Cars (the Disney movie) the diecast metal ones, Thomas (takealong) swords and shields, rubber snakes...not cool.
Favorite books: Are You My Mother? (why yes I am) The Big Book of Trains, You Are Special by Max Lucado
Favorite things to entertain himself with: Hitting Brody with any object that can made into a sword....so like everything. Playing with inanimate objects such as salt shakers, chap stick and paint bottles. Singing and dancing (and this kid can shake his hips!) reading, did I mention hitting his brother?
Age: 16 months
Shoe size: 5
Clothing Size: 18-24 months
Favorite Foods: just about anything...he's a human garbage disposal.
Favorite toys: anything Baylor has in his hands, tractors, trains, things that make noise
Favorite books: He won't sit still for any book....but we managed to make it through the Cars and Truck and Things that Go by Richard Scarry and Goodnight Moon.
Favorite activities: taking anything Baylor has in his hands, throwing mini tantrums that involve hitting head on floor and dramatically throwing himself on the ground, not napping, wiping his snotty nose on my legs, climbing on anything and everything including the toilet, kitchen table and inside the bathtub...with water...fully clothed, running in the opposite direction of mom, sticking things in his mouth.
These stats and updates are brought to you today by the letter F as in FRIDAY and the number 15 as in how many minutes Brody napped today.
Wednesday, November 19, 2008
Brody! Show me your surprise face.....(don't pay attention to the fact that he's naked....my kids are always naked)
My favorite lunch. Toasted cheese (or grilled as weird people call it) and tomato soup...following in mom's footsteps dunking the sand which in the soup. Mmmmmm.
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Yesterday we had David and Elizabeth and their mommy Andrea come up to visit us. We went to school together and our kids are about six months apart. Baylor had a blast sharing his trains and David was in train heaven! Brody thought it might be fun to throw blocks at Elizabeth's head, so we put a stop to that one. Baylor also informed us that he wants a sister. Well son, after your Emmy award winning performance today, lets put that thought on hold.
I'm watching He-Man right now...do you remember that show? With Sorcerer and Man or Arms and his tiger Thundercat (wait, it's battlecat..thanks Janice!) and that flying dude Orco? I watched it all the time with my brother and I thought it was cool, but it's even better now that I'm all grown up. It magically appeared in our mailbox today :) Baylor is enthrawled....enamered...in his own little world....hey, whatever works. I just need a moment.
Monday, November 17, 2008
I got my Christmas decorations up though...I know, it's early....I'm not sure what possessed me. Brody has knocked over the tree, four times and broken two ornaments and the computer mouse all within five minutes of each other. The destroyer strikes again.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Meet Melman. Melman is a crazy hypochondriac giraffe from the movie Madagascar...in which we have watched 13 times in the last week thanks to the Lisbon Library. He kind of grows on you...especially in this pose don't you think? Okay,point...McDonald's is putting these wonderfully plastic Chinese manufactured Madagascar toys in their Happy Meals and we made the trek to get one on Friday and came home with not one, but TWO Melmans. Oohhhh baby. Now let me tell you a little about how attached Baylor gets with certain toys or even inanimate objects such as rocks, sticks or gourds (Yes, gourds) He carries them everywhere, he eats with them...clutching on to them with a death grip like there's no tomorrow....he pees with them (which is really quite amusing, I'll spare the details) he sleeps with them snuggled up to his face and he even thanks God for them when we pray at night (Dear God, thank you for my gourds...I pray that too Baylor, except I ask for bigger ones ) So he has been particularly attached to these stinkin giraffes...toting them around like an extra appendage, sleeping with them, eating with them and making darn sure his little brother doesn't come close to them. Until.....the unthinkable happened. We (okay, me) left them at Grandma's house and didn't realize until I was far far away....can we say MELTDOWN!!!! 20 minutes and buckets of large crocodile tears later, he sniffled and shuffled his little feet into the house with the hopes that his Melmens would return. So, I will save the day (and at the appropriate time of course) go retrieve those stinkin giraffes. Man, the sacrifices we make for the ones we love.
Baylor and I had a date this morning with my friend Melissa from high school. We ran together and were always handing off to each other in relays. She is just as gorgeous as she was in high school (totally jealous!) We took him to the mall and walked (or more like drug) him into a few stores and then were treated to lunch (thanks Melissa!) I like spending one on one time with him when I can focus on him instead of what Brody man will destroy next. I'm looking forward to the day when I can take Brody out in public again :)
Friday, November 14, 2008
Today I will enlighten you with what our afternoon consisted of yesterday. Man, I love to dance....and apparently so do my kids....doesn't matter where either. We tend to break out in dance at the sound of any beat, cell phone rings or toaster oven ticking. You're right...that is my kitchen table Brody has christened with his naked toes...I turn around for one second and BAM! the kid is on the table doing his Michael Flatley impersonation. Now he is the dancing destroyer.
If this is the way Baylor is going to dance at Prom, I needn't worry about the ladies....they'll be standing across the room in horror. Makes me think of the scene in Nothing To Lose where Tim Robbins has flaming poo on his feet and is trying to extinguish....no flaming poo here...just flinging poo. Which by the way, Baylor reminded me that his nickname is the poo flinger yesterday at dinner. I teach my children such valuable nuggets don't I?
And for your final viewing pleasure, we have Brody man, Lord of the dance, master destroyer...trying to wink and looking a little like the Genie on Bewitched. We're working on it....between the winking and the dancing, I'm pretty sure smooth isn't his middle name....yet.
Thursday, November 13, 2008
1. Sleep in
2. Take a long hot shower (in the morning!), shave legs and get ready without interruptions from midgets
3. Get a fancy coffee and a very unhealthy pastry, read my bible, paper and a good magazine in silence
4. Check my email, facebook and blog all in one sitting, while still sipping delicious fancy coffee
6. Take my family out to lunch, just as long as I don't have to cook (brody will stay in the high chair the entire time!)
7. Take a nap...a long one (now actually being able to sleep is another story)
8. Have my kids actually take LONG naps....and wake up happy
9. Organize things in my house that have been put on hold
10. Play with my boys without worrying about creating huge messes or cleaning up...let the maid do that :)
11. Go to a movie with Lonnie and butter my own popcorn
12. Fancy dinner...for free of course :)
Now I know this is crazy talk...or more like a dream, but a girl can dream can't she? I just have to remember what is important, what can't go unnoticed...like feeding the midgets and bathing.....and that I have no control. This holiday season I will try not to stress about my enormous to-do list, money or my hair....I still have a mullet!!! I suggest you do the same (you really don't have to stress about my hair unless you want to )
What would be on your list?
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
Did that just come out of my three year olds mouth? Sure did. I asked him what he just said (which just fueled his fire) and he sang the song to me again with a huge boy grin on his face Crap. What have I done. We had the chat and found a new song to sing that did not involve Britney or clearly inappropriate lyrics for a three year old to be singing. So with that being said, I will be so much more careful about what I'm listening to either at home or in the car because they are listening!!! (weather we like it or not!)
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
Now really, how can you resist a man in a suit? I can't, I get weak in the knees. I have a feeling I will be beating the ladies off with sticks! If everything goes according to planned, my boys will be chivalrous gentlemen that no woman can resist....but they'll have to go through me first :) No really. I've already made a 245 point questionnaire for any future suitors...can suitors be women? Just go with me on this one. Anyways, I just pray for their future wives...wives meaning ONE a piece...I'm not down with polygamy folks. I pray that they find a wonderful woman who loves the Lord and wants to honor them and respect them too. It frightens me to see how many women these days refuse to respect their husbands. I have fallen off that wagon a few times but always get back on and try my hardest to honor and respect Lonnie...and I will admit it's a hard thing for me. These women have had feminism rubbed in their faces and believe that they are equal or superior to men. If God would have wanted us to rule, he would have made us first and said, men obey your wives...but not so much. Now I'm not talking about the give your husband a foot rub when he comes home when you meet him at the door with sexy clothes and a hot toddy, although I'm sure no man would say no to that. Might be a nice treat once in a while. I'm talking about the kind of respect that is paid back with love. It's a great full circle, we give them respect, they give us love. (Echerichs, Love and Respect..great book!) I encourage you to try the respect challenge for a week. Try try try your hardest to do everything with respect weather it be in the tone you answer (or actually letting him talk) the way you react, listen or agree with his decisions. It's tough, but I guarantee you will see a HUGE result. So really all I wanted to do was show that that cute photo of my son in a suit and you got a sermon today...suprise! Grain of salt my friends, grain of salt.
Make sure to thank your local Vetrans today for serving our country!!!
Monday, November 10, 2008
This is what happens when you leave the pepper on the table for Baylor to experiment with. I'm really glad I wasn't there to clean that one up...way to go dad for grabbing the camera!!
...hmmmm I don't remember buying that ice cream cone at the store last time?
The first "snow" Baylor runs to the window, looks at me and proclaims, "MOM! I need my coat, boots and hat and of course the shovel, I need to shovel the walk!!!" Unfortunately the snow didn't stick but he just earned himself a new job this winter.
Brody's new favorite spot, right by his big brother.
Thursday, November 6, 2008
1. Pee alone. HUGE deal when you always have someone staring at you, sitting on your lap or trying to stuff toilet paper in the toilet....when you're still on it. I will even be able to flush by myself. Holy cow.
2. Eat at a restaurant.....sitting down the whole time. You see, I do this little jig at meal times where I get up and down and get the milk and wipe up the spilled applesauce and get second helpings and strap Brody down etc etc etc. That is how I stay slim, no time to eat, must feed children, wipe faces and clean up dishes. I will stuff my face this weekend, sitting down of course.
3. Sleep all night without interruptions like crying, coughing or vomiting munchkins. Granted, my roomies in the hotel might snore so I won't keep my fingers crossed on this one. Odds are I'll be up at the crack of dawn anyways because my body is used to it now, but hey..they have a workout room.
4. Not worry about getting someone home for a nap. I'm always planning my schedules around sleeping. I know I'll still worry about naps, even if they are 365 miles away.
5. Read a book that does not have colorful pictures or is about trains, backhoes or monkeys...and I'll read it in my head and not out loud with funny voices...but now that I think about it, that might be fun.
6. Go through the day without peanut butter smeared on my butt (Brody hits me right there) or milk spilled down my front. Okay, I take that back. I'm a messy eater so no promises on that one either.
7. Shower first thing in the morning. I usually am busy getting boys fed and dressed and playing before I get to shower and it ends up being nap time before I can get to it.
8. Stay up later than 10. oooohhh I'm so rebellious!
We play at 7:00pm in Geneva, IL in a church and then Saturday at 11am in St.Charles. If you think about it, shoot up a prayer for Lonnie and the boys. I totally trust him, he's wonderful with them. Secretly in my head I am excited for Lonnie to see how I roll during the day and then what I really really want to hear when I get back is, "man, I don't know how you do it, you're amazing." He's already informed me that he's not doing any housework, just watching the boys...which isn't fair, but I'll give him props. I have my super anal mom list for him complete with schedules, fun activities and meal ideas and their clothes laid out for two days....did someone say obsessive compulsive? Naw. I'm sure he'll do great, it's just my job to worry.
Wednesday, November 5, 2008
What? I'm really thirsty and apparently you don't care.....I'm just going to give you my pouty lip face and see if you'll help me.
I can do it...I can do it....grunt grunt grunt (pay no attention to the horrible 80's shell sinks...they came with the house and are by no means a reflection of the homeowners personal style)
...if I can just wedge my foot in here somehow...erh grrrr
...perfect....now which one is the cold water....
Tuesday, November 4, 2008
Monday, November 3, 2008
Our little tiger and dog...Brody is trying sooo hard to pull of the hood.
Here is the finished product. Much better than before!!! (sorry Lonnie, I know you think I'm trying to get rid of all your "bachelor" furniture :)
I went as a basket of dirty laundry...how fitting, seeing as that is what I stare at most days and it consumes my life....where does it all come from? I only have two kids?!!! (why yes, those are underwear on my head...clean as a whistle....and some kid asked me if they were my little brother's underwear...hmmm, not sure how to take that one)
Saturday, November 1, 2008
Funny Baylor story. We're at home eating and he looks at me and gets right up in face all serious. "mom, I really need a very beautiful pretty cracker...and these (pointing to graham crackers) are not pretty beautiful crackers." He was referring to the saltine crackers on the table. Son, if you think those are "pretty beautiful crackers" you go right ahead and down a few.
Let me start by saying it was by God's grace that I decided on a whim to have Baylor spend the night with grandma last night, otherwise I would have been toting two sleepy kids to the crazy ER in the middle of the night. Praise God and thank you mom!
So Lonnie is gone, and this of course means one of my children will fall ill. It was Brody this time with his buckets full of snot. He was doing great, we went trick or treating (photos coming soon) and went over the my old neighborhood and got to re-live some memories from my old neighbors! I think we were their only guests because they dumped half of their candy into Baylor's bag! (hooray for chocolate!) I kissed Baylor goodnight and noticed Mr. Snotface was starting to wheeze and cough a little...but thought it was because we have been running naked through the house.....wait, they...not WE, I kept my britches on thank you (although the thought did cross my mind) Soooooo I get home and am super excited to have a bed to myself and a tired baby....who seems to be coughing more and more. I lubed him up with vapo rub, plugged in the humidifiers and prayed for sleep. The coughing got worse and so did the wheezing and his poor little chest was doing the "please I need more air" move. So at 2am, and neither of us sleeping very well prior, I packed up and got in the car, praying for many things...1. No deer tonight God, have them do their mating dash across the highway somewhere else 2. For Brody of course, poor little dude was laboring 3. The ER.....on Halloween...I saw that episode and it wasn't pretty. We got there and it was quiet (thank you Lordy) I asked if they were busy and they said there were slower than normal....lots of nurses chatting and hanging around......BUT we still ended up waiting? Long story short....got a nebulizer treatment but was still wheezy, did a RSV test (it was negative) and he finally stopped wheezing long enough to fall asleep on the exam table. Time: 5:30am Crazies: One lady yelling naughty words and screaming (yes, she's going to jail), one goblin at triage waiting for a dr...very freaky, one dude at the door grabbing his arm and moaning and crying and hobbling....I held the door and then made a mad dash, two cops and a partridge in a pear tree. Home by 5:45ish and crashed for an hour...then wailing for a half hour for some strange reason....gave him another nebulizer and he is finally sleeping again. Still coughing like a mad man, but breathing better. Why am I not sleeping you ask? Good question. I tried, believe me....two hours is NOT enough sleep for me. The coffee kicked in right about the time I wanted to rest so I opted for dishes, laundry, planning next week's meals and blogging.
Baylor is having a blast over and Grandma's house (I think I might just leave him there as long as humanly possible) So if you think about it, just pray that we can all sleep and Brody gets better soon!